Whether you're new to sex or have been in the game for decades, there's always room to be a better lover. Certainly, attraction and chemistry play major roles in a successful sexual experience, but there are many other factors that can make or break your intimate experiences. As a former clinical mental health therapist, I've seen plenty of couples struggle to keep their romance alive in the bedroom due to misunderstandings, poor communication, and lack of intimacy-building activities outside the bedroom.
If you want to be a better lover, you have to get out of your comfort zone. Whether it's the positions you play or the way you approach foreplay, shaking up your routine can give you more confidence and intuition in the bedroom. Plus, it can help you learn to read the signals your partner gives you so you know what they enjoy and what doesn't feel good.
In addition to changing up the physical part of your lovemaking, you can also add a little extra titillation to your sex life by texting your partner suggestively, or even just touching them in a playful way throughout the day. When it comes to sex, it's important to let your partner know that you are interested in exploring their unexplored pleasures and curiosities, but that you are also respectful of their boundaries.
Finally, good lovers are able to listen to their partner's needs, both physical and emotional. This is called attunement and it makes for a deeper, more intuitive and satisfying experience.